Saturday, May 26, 2012

hello and goodbye

hi, i'm leaving this dump which I used to call my blog. I thought I'd have trouble departing with my online nick - "sototallymelo" but seems like it's not that hard to leave it all behind. (I thought that name was brilliant okay!)

anyways, find me at my new blog if you want to. hehe


get it get it? hahaha. good bye. so long, farewell. :) 

Thursday, May 24, 2012


just done with Reaction Engineering midterm last night! feeling so so relieved. but it's not over! there's another Fluid finals tomorrow >:(

anyways, I've been thinking about things that happened. how I put the blame on you, but thinking back you did made an effort to try to talk to me but it was me who ignored it cause I was angry. :| i'm a really bad person gaahh. really hope i'll have the chance to make things right.

on the other hand, people really have to smile more. like this girl working in Student Services, she's very pretty. while walking in campus I made eye contact with her, and she smiled. I was a little shocked as she didn't strike me as a friendly kind of person, but that smile warmed my heart. that's what a smile does! It brightens your day.

unlike some other people in Curtin. I took the initiative of smiling and they just looked at me like i'm some kind of alien. FYI smiling doesn't mean I know you, it could just be a friendly smile from stranger to stranger what. why you all so uptight can't even accept my smile?? -.-

maybe i'll smile at you the next time our eyes lock. :) 

Sunday, May 20, 2012


- Blogging from my phone now. Kinda lazy to switch on my computer to blog.. Haha -

I'm back from possibly one of the best parties of the year. I'm happy. This feeling of awesomeness is overwhelming. Though I might get scolded tomorrow for being out way past curfew!

Thing is, so much happened in one night. Like I said, the party. But on the other hand, there are some stuffs that kinda bummed me too. The cold reply? I know it's probably nothing. He wasn't in the mood anyways, but it just bothered me. Maybe I just expected too much. I expected you to treat me as someone you could share your troubles with. But sadly I am not.

Another thing.. The dreaded truth has finally been revealed. I saw it with my own eyes. You know what hurt me the most? The fact that you ignored me even after I told you to stop. Not even for me?

So that's why I'm sad. And that's why I'm happy. But the night ended well and here I am happy. Though I have to admit this feeling is kinda weird. It's like I can't contain this happiness but then part of me still feels sad. And another small part of me feels like I'm obliged to feel sad, or something. I'm definitely a weirdo. /.\

Sunday, May 13, 2012

happy ?

it's like I finally came back to my senses. what is wrong with my blog it's so depressing! I can't find anything to write about except these sad thoughts that are probably made up by my brain because I let it. 

and there I was, looking at other people's blogs. they write about happy things, take gorgeous pictures of their outings, food, sights, things worth writing down and remembering. so that's when it strike me. why remember the bad, when there's so much good? twitter's the place to rant cause what you write in twitter won't be remembered. but your blog? that shit's stuck for life, unless you delete it :p 

with this new change in mind, I just realized I haven't been taking pictures for awhile now. haha. I used to be the one who brings her camera along and takes pics but now? nothing LOL! or maybe that's cause all my activities seem to revolve around saving the world. *cough* L4D *cough* HAHAHA!! 

anyways, choose happiness. everyone deserves to be happy. even me! :D 

3/4 of the Four Seasons. :)

wishing all mothers a very Happy Mother's Day.


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

i hate this part right here

hate.. that seems to be the word that circles my head most of the time nowadays. hate. hate hate hate hate hate. i hate this, I hate that, I hate him, I hate her. what is wrong with me?!

I never wanted to be like this. I never intended for this to happen. how did i let myself become so.. pathetic? one little thing goes wrong, then I go crazy and suddenly everything is wrong. everyone is wrong. little did I know I was the one who is wrong.

i don't know who i am anymore. looking in the mirror, i no longer recognize myself. all the thoughts i've had, anger i've directed at innocent people. i don't know why is everything going wrong. can something just turn out right for once?

just once. please let something good happen to me. i don't want to be the girl who feels sorry for herself, i've been feeling that way for way too long.

 “She was just some little girl who everyone stopped fighting for,” 
“Truth is a battle of perceptions. People only see what they’re prepared to confront. It’s not what you look at, it’s what you see.”