let this end please

I knew this world isn't fair. but it just sucks being treated so badly, all because I'm not pretty enough?

I've never felt so much anger inside me, not just because of this incident, but many things added up together. I hate, I scream out profanities (when i'm alone in my car wtf) and I just think of things I can do to make them regret, to make them pay for the way they made me feel.

is my post scaring you? bet you never expected happy go lucky Melo to be so dark and gloomy. I guess happiness never did last after all. I know I shouldn't be bothered, but then again, why shouldn't I be bothered? it's rude and offensive and it hurts!! :(

disappointed

every now and then i do something that makes me feel disappointed with myself. ughghg my posts have been so emo lately. that sucks. where's the happy-go-lucky melo??

i hate how things are turning out. i neglect my studies, and all of a sudden all these wants pop out of nowhere. i think i should just lock myself at home. i feel like such a disappointment. i hate that word. it pierces a hole through my heart every time i hear it. even more so when it's directed to me. you wouldn't understand. that pain i felt when i heard those words. you probably won't know that i feel guilty, very guilty. but i'm just thankful that i got away unscathed. i still remember the last time something like this happened. it was the scariest moment of my life, i swear. i've told no one about it. no one.

when's the end of the world? is it soon? i hope it is cause this world is seriously messed up.


and time, why does it pass so fast! can you slow down for me? i really need you to. i have all this mess in my head that i need to clear up so i can focus on my studies. i really need to start cramming those books. God knows how lazy i've been this sem. sigh. sigh sigh sigh.

it's a constant battle

splurged on new glasses today. darn. suddenly feel so so poor.
i must say i kinda regret spending that much. but the other half of me thinks that it is worth it.

ahh
this never ending battle inside my head. but what's bought is bought. haha
rest assured, i'm happy :)

i took out all my previous bank transaction slips just now, and wrote all my expenses on my notebook. the figures were shocking. in a bad way. i spend way too much. darn it. okayy no more. for now.

but i really want that Starbucks Tee. how la?

:(((((( 

musketeers rocks!

one pic says it all. hehehe :)

Jac dalring joined our lecture today. hehe. no work today too :))
attended a wedding in Mater Dei. sang at the choir with dalring. it was funnn ^-^

the best man is hot. *wink wink*
he's so fair, look like Edward Cullen's brother. hahaha!!


had sho much fun in lecture. hmmm actually ok ok lah. bo-o-ring. :D
played with Bobby's camera. i am now in love with his camera. *~*

all the pix in this post were taken with his camera. zomgggg.
so nicee can?!

accident

*WARNING* this is a zero picture post!

just back from breakfast with da jie, sushi, Yun Hui, Jia Ying, Jeen Yan and Lester! 

it was fun. long time didn't see Sushi. hoho really missed her. (: 

and glad to see da jie again, scare this'll be the last time i can meet her :( she'll be leaving for NZ soon. aghh !

was supposed to meet them at Boulevard last night.. but well, something happened... 

and i'm here to blog about that something. 

ahh it all happened too suddenly. like, one second i was happily driving (okay not really i was doing something else as well *guilty*) then the next thing i knew i heard this defeaning 'BOOM' sound. 

and i was like OMG this cannot be happening to me. 

i mean, i've never been in a car accident before bah.. =S 

guess that made me a lil' cocky lor. like "impossible i'll be involved in an accident"

y'know? 

guhh.. 

but it really did happen. i was text messaging (i know i got myself into this so don't give me that look) and then i hit the car in front of me. 

the guy stopped, so i stopped too. went down and took a look. at first glance it seemed like nothing happened lor. so i was sort of relief? and i asked him "err ok ka?"

LOL

he glared at me wtf 

and said "macam mana leh amoi?" 

woahh he looked like death. so so fierce the face 

frightened me T.T

then i don't know what to do mar. so i said, "err.. you gimme your number then .."

him: "later you run away how??"

then i was like.. err true also hor. HAHAHA

so he asked me to drive in front cos we were blocking. and there's this police truck there. and dono why at the time i thought it was an ambulance. ZZZ

so i said "err ambulance there ka?"

there was a pause. 

and he said 

"mana ambulance. police sana lah!"

OMG

only then i realized how screwed i was. imagine, getting the police involved! walauuu !

i thought for sure my license bye bye liao

scared the hell outta me T__T 

then i started trembling wtf

turns out the police were well... funny. haha!

stopped the car there, only then i noticed his car.. the back bumper came off -___-

damn strong ler me. HAHA

then the police said to me "amoi your car leh?"

only then i realized i haven't even look at my car yet. =( 

miraculously, no damage at all! (: 

then the police(s) started making jokes, saying "waa kuat hor Vios. next time saya mau beli Vios juga." 

(wow Vios so strong hor, next time i also wanna buy vios.)

-____-

damn lame one. 

then the guy was calling his friend asking how much to change his bumper.
when i asked he said
"3.5"

i choked, literally. took a deep breath, then asked
"err.. 3.5k?"

O.O


they all laughed at me -___-
then the guy (finally) smiled and said,
"3.5k.. 3 hundred 50 lah.
if 3.5k i can change new engine liao lor."

so phew. what a relief HAHA


so the guy asked me to call my dad. ahh.. i was shocked.. i wanted to uknow.. settle this without involving my parents :(
guhh and i broke down when calling. like i realized this is out of my hands? :S
and also i was afraid dad'll kill me. -___-

then they all laughed at me, AGAIN!!
saying
"waaa.. crying ah amoi?"

=.="
i wanted to say YES I AM CAN'T YOU SEE. !


bahh so in the end dad and mum came over. settled everything and went home :O
thank God I had Cryssy to confide to. hehe thanks girl ! ;D

ok lah i'm fine now. better go pack. going Marudi soon! hoohoooo!!

smile?

waaa....

so long didn't update liaos !

haha..

many people complained

T,T

neways,

finally finished the calculation part of the Physics report.

apuhhh..

the rest done by Rohit..

gosh

he really is the saviour of our group

if he's not in our group we reli GG liao!!

@@

there is ONE particular reason why I must pass this subject:

I DON'T WANNA STAY BACK AND SEE HER FACE AGAIN NEXT SEM !!

gahh !!

went to da jie's house just now

do Malaysian Study project

T_T

(oh keliannnya my life)

but we had fun larh !

hahass.

I was the latest

as usual !!

:

Sushi's VAIO

T___T

haix !

I want one larh.. *sobs*

haha.
saw this bear in one of the cabinets
qiang wen lehhs !!!

LMAOO!!!!

;D

pink bear : *screams*

ok larh sorry lah I really sot liao !!
blame it on all those homeworks assignments them lecturers keep giving us !!

grrrrr ~
can die you know !!
and now I suddenly remember that I have eng. math Quiz tomorrow !

SHIT MUCH ???

not yet start leh wtf

=.=

duhh.
dun care lah..
haha...
gao tim this post then zzzzz
wakaka!!

just now so funny,
for MS, we're gonna perform a drama.
then all of us girls dun wanna be the main character...

why?

cos need to be rape !

hahahaha!!!

so to be fair,
we all decided to draw lo..
lucky draw hahaha!!

then then then,
so ci ji larh !
Jing Hung folded the papers
one of it has a star in it.
who got that paper jiu happy lo
hahaa!!

was so nervous...
Shin Zhi opened hers 1st
then she shout happily lorh say not her.
then I was like,
"oh no... could it really be me??"
T,T

then Ah Wee opened hers,
and I was like,
please be her please be her
LOL!!!

then not !
T____T

magu...

damn sad k!!
only left Sushi, da jie and me...
WTH !!

was so so so ginteo !!
then I thought to myself,
"okay it's now or never"

just as I was about to open my paper.....

da jie: (screams like a mad woman who just found out that one of her thirteen cats died)
ma ji!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my gosh,

that was the most high pitched version of "ma ji" ever !!

but of course,
it was the most sweetest sound ever !

muahahaaahhaa
*sorry da jie*

hahahaha!!!

cause it meant that I don't have to play that role

lelelelelele!!!
*evil laugh*

*glee*

my hubby !

^o^

Bean Bean ♥

hehehee !!
he's so cute larhh

to let him have some exercise,
(cause he is seriously overweight!)

let him run in the cage thingyy
then he run run run in the cage thingy,
till he can't run no more
hahah!!
so cute :P

see?
he tired liao !!
wakaka !
cute

this one also..
haha...
omg dun sue me ohh pet lovers..
cos I didn't mistreat him okayy !!
just cute to see him so tired
hahaha

this is my personal fav!

ngaiti.. so cute...
hand put liddat lagi..
wakakka !!

Saturday night, went yam teh with my loversss
♥

Poh Lim back from KL too !
so went to celebrate ^O^
gathering ~
long time didn't gather together already =(
miss my lovers larhh

hehe.

Susan darling still so funny,
Kri laopo still as blur, Doris dear still as loud,
Poh Lim still as...
I dunno how he used to be oh. LOL!!
but he became fairer larh.
skin also more smooth. hahas!!
Karen babe still as much a shopaholic as before!!
ROAR!!
if you know how much she spent and how much she bought you'd hate her too!

haha!! :P

we ate at Yong Le again.
haha..
I think sooner or later this place'll be where all AWHYO gatherings will be held.
haha..
cos not bad the place,
can talk talk talk.

but that time,
it rained halfway then need to change table ._.
the table inside so hot !
plus the guys beside us were smoking wtf
I think I loss half my lifespan..

ngaiti...

shit man !

hohoho !
I shall blog about how funny my darling is !
:D

PL was talking bout how come those famous+expensive brands cannot last long in Miri,
eventhough there are many rich ppl in Miri.
then he was like ,
if can last,
I'll open one franchise here liao loh !

Susan: (rolls eyes*)
you man man dream lah !

then suddenly got a girl bringing french fries passby.

then Susan was like,

"waseh so ngam arh.. PL talk bout what french fries jiu got french fries passby"

hahaha!!!!

Kri: (tou xiao liddat)
Susan arh ni hen hao xiao.

haha!!

all of them so cute larh...

ngaiti..
I'm in love with you all larh ! :(...

then this afternoon,
was messaging with Susan,
she asked me, is my Uni life happy?

then I said, if I kao dao that ang moh then happy loh.

Susan said,

" oh then I think you will not happy lah."

hahaa!!!

aidii....

love you ah darling,
make me laugh all the time. haha!!

neways,
check out the goods Karen bought for me while in SG!
;D

car thingy...
ngaitii..
I think I really will tio lap !
hahaha!!

born to shop...
yea baby !! ;D

wooo~

last but not least,
pencil case brought back by PL !!!

gahh~
finally I waited so long for this pencil case leh !!
haha...

but what can I say,

it's worth the wait

:)

while sending Karen back that night,
we talked about AWHYO luh..
cause seems like...
sooner or later ,
we're all gonna leave Miri...

ngaiti..
Karen tio JPA, Bryan also..
both gonna leave sooner o later larh !!
susan, Doris and Kri,
sure leaving also when go for Uni..
WTHH!!!
Terry, SS, Daryl, HH, Ee Hau and C3 already left !!!

by the time I know it,
it'll be just me,
all alone in this shiit town/city WHATEVER!!

Karen was like,
AWHYO left so little ppl edi...
just now eat one table already enough..

walau..
so true....
ngaitii....

to think,
last time,
we had to book before going anywhere in case there isn't enough space for all of us...
last time,
we used to have gatherings all the time..

be it at the back of the class during recess,
or going out for dinner somewhere,
OR even at Jamilah !
haha..
good times, good times....

(I sound so old don't I?)

haha...

dun care larh..
I miss those days,
back then I was like a prisoner,
still not able to drive yet.
and we would have gatherings,
then I'd be the last to confirm,
cause I always don't have the guts to ask my parents :/
but in the end, (most of the times)
I'd make it.

then always tumpang HH and Daryl's car.

and follow Terry's car when going back !

hahaa..
and I'd always say paiseh oh always folo your car.
HH of course lah dun give face,
straight say ya loh then jio jio jio LOL!!
come to think of it,
long time didn't jio by him already ! :(
then Daryl,

he would always say,
next time when you can drive I folo your car loh.
hahass...
these two are my tumpang-mates bah.. cause they live near me..
while the others are all at Pujut there.. excluding c3 that is.. lol

when going back,

always too paiseh to folo HH or Daryl so I'll beg and beg Terry to give me a lift.
hahaha!!
then he not bad also larh,
always agree in the end.
but of course there's a whole lot of jio-ing in between (he won't let me go that easily T,T)

haha..

but seriously,
thanks guys for always letting me tumpang!!
haha..
haix...
come back larh I can give you all lifts everyday and I won't complain one bit !!
:P

nah..
on second thought,

that's just too risky.
LOL!

miss you all...

duh..

how can I turn back time?

what would it take,
for me to gain back all those times we had together?
to relive all those moments shared, memories created.

if I had one wish,
that'll be it.

I'd wish that somehow, someway,
I can have my friends back.

each and every one of them

back from wherever they are now.

just one dinner,

one dinner together, all 13 of us, with nobody missing.

is that possible?

haha..
so silly of me to be crying right now.
I just....

miss you all.

gahhh

arghh

tomorrow's Mother's Day already and I haven't got a proper plan!!

:(

lets hope everything goes well..

you know what?

my hand is like,

so rough compared to last time.

*sobs*

it tears my heart to know that such a vital part of my body...

how I know that it is rougher than last time?

well~

I was rubbing my fingers marh..

then my hand was near my ear,

so I heard this,

sand-like sound.

and was like,

o.o what that sound har?

I even looked around

-___-

imagine how shocked and hurt I was when I found out it was actually the sound of my fingers rubbing!!

OMG!

so rough liao my fingers til rub also got sound

WTH!!

LAST TIME DAMN SMOOTH ONE EVEN RUB ALSO SOUNDLESS LEH!!!!

SAD!

T_T